In spite of misinformation, Black dads like Eric Graham (second from left), pictured with his wife and three sons, are on duty and making a difference wherever they stand. Courtesy Eric Graham.

At a recent community breakfast in Fort Bend County, Justice of the Peace Roderick Garner broke down while reflecting on the weight of caring for his aging parents, LaVoice and Horace Garner.

โ€œTaking care of your parents is tough,โ€ he shared through tears. โ€œYou never know, because theyโ€™re always taking care of you.โ€

Judge Roderick Garner shows up to care for his mother, LaVoice Garner, and father, Horace (not pictured), as well as his children and grandchildren. Courtesy Roderick Garner.

Additionally, Garner shows up daily for his daughter (Jessica) and grandchildren (R.J, and Aaliyah). And though his son, Roderick Jr. passed away last November, despite the pain of that loss, Garner continues to show up for his Ft. Bend community. In doing so, Garner isnโ€™t an exception. Heโ€™s the rule.

Despite the tired and false โ€œabsent Black fatherโ€ trope, the truth is clear: Black dads are showing up for their families, schools and communities in powerful, consistent and inspiring ways.

YouTube video

A 2015 CDC study found that Black fathers, whether married to their childrenโ€™s mothers or not, were just as presentโ€”and in some cases more presentโ€”in their childrenโ€™s lives than dads of other races. Still, negative stereotypes persist, amplified by racist online trolls, conservative media talking points and even pop culture.

But statistics and lived reality tell another story: Black dads are, and always have been, on duty.

Fatherhood essentials

Christopher Parker is a shining example of the multiple ways Black fathers show up and show out in their efforts to make a positive difference. Credit: Aswad Walker.

For fathers like Eric Graham, fatherhood is about recognizing the joy and responsibility of guiding the next generation. Graham and his wife, Lynn, raised three sons: Max (31), Cody (26) and Chad (24). And Graham cherishes watching them grow.

โ€œThe biggest joy would have to be the learning process,โ€ Graham said. โ€œWatching the light bulb go off as they grew, and them realizing, โ€˜Oh, that is true,โ€™ from things we taught them.โ€

Christopher Parker, husband to nurse practitioner Dr. Cynae Johnson, is dad to three children: Alexander, a North Shore 10th grader balancing AP classes and basketball; Cairo, a five-year-old fluent in three languages; and Cydney, who attends St. Maryโ€™s in Third Ward.

For Parker, the best part of fatherhood is unconditional love.

โ€œTo come home every day and hear, โ€˜Daddy!โ€™โ€”thatโ€™s awesome. A childโ€™s love, you canโ€™t put a price on that,โ€ said Parker. โ€œWe get judged so much as Black men in America, just walking out the door. But with your kids, thereโ€™s no judgment.โ€

Both men agree: The essentials of being a father of impact are joy and showing up.

At home

Showing up is what sets difference-making dads apart.

โ€œEngagement is the biggest thing,โ€ Graham explained. โ€œWe always ate dinner together. That was our time to talk, to figure out what was going on at school. It was really instrumental in their success.โ€

Parker echoed the importance of presence.

โ€œAll of my friends, married or not, take care of their kids,โ€ shared Parker. โ€œWe are going to baseball games, tutoring, showing them how to change a tire. Iโ€™m teaching my 15-year-old son that right now. We are involved.โ€

Despite media misrepresentations, these fathers and countless others prove that Black dads are as present at home as anywhere else.

At school

The impact of Black fathers stretches into classrooms and hallways.

In 2021, after a string of violent fights at Southwood High School in Shreveport, Louisiana, a group of dads formed Dads on Duty. Their daily presence calmed the school almost overnight.

โ€œWeโ€™re not a security force,โ€ said co-founder Michael LaFitte II. โ€œWeโ€™re just fathers who are changing the narrative of our campus.โ€

The groupโ€™s viral story, captured by CBS News and viewed more than 50 million times, inspired chapters nationwide, including in Texas.

โ€œJust saying a simple good morning can change a studentโ€™s day,โ€ said Dr. Billy Johnson, a DeSoto teacher and Dads on Duty member.

Judge Roderick Garner (right) and Judge Tyra McCollum, welcome Willowridge HS students back to a new school year. Courtesy Roderick Garner.

Closer to home, Garner joined other fathers and mothers at Willowridge High School to welcome students back on the first day. Across the country, dads are proving that a fatherโ€™s presence in schools doesnโ€™t just support their childrenโ€”it uplifts entire student bodies.

In the community

Black dads also show up beyond their households and schools, making communities stronger.

Parker models this commitment. He teaches in Good Hope Missionary Baptist Churchโ€™s Rooted and Grounded program, where his kids see him in leadership. He also serves with Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity, Inc., participates in Thanksgiving and Christmas outreach, sits on the board of a new youth baseball program and volunteers throughout Missouri City and Riverside Terrace.

Professionally, Parker has practiced speech therapy for over 15 years, helping children with autism, Down syndrome, epilepsy and other neurological conditions.

Mufasaโ€™s Pride creates a safe space for urban adolescent males between the ages of 12-17 to redefine their meaning of manhood through community-based programs. Courtesy Mufasaโ€™s Pride.

Organizations across Houston amplify this spirit of service.

  • Mufasaโ€™s Pride Rites of Passage Program has, since 2010, helped young men redefine manhood in a safe, supportive environment. โ€œWith the kind of work that we do, you need transparency,โ€ said mentor William North. โ€œThese young people can tell if youโ€™re not genuine.โ€
  • 100 Black Men of Metropolitan Houston mentors youth in education, health, and economic empowerment. โ€œIf you want to go far, letโ€™s all go together,โ€ said one of their leaders at the groupโ€™s recent pinning ceremony.
  • CoolxDad, founded by Kevin Barnett, empowers fathers to build better futures for their children and communities. Barnett was inspired by George Floydโ€™s murder to create a space for fathers like him to lead change. โ€œI remember shedding a tear and thinking, โ€˜How can I be part of the change I want to see?โ€™โ€
  • The African American Male Wellness Agency (Houston) and Avengers Youth Mentoring Organization also provide vital resources, mentorship and health services to fathers and families.

These groups highlight what families have always known: Black dads are pillars in the community.

100 Black Men of Metropolitan Houston is an organization many Black fathers utilize to expand their community impact. Credit; 100bmoh.org.

Resources for Black fathers

For Houston-area fathers seeking support or fellowship, these organizations are making an impact:

  • 100 Black Men of Metropolitan Houston โ€“ 100bmoh.org, info@100blackmenhou.org, (877) 429-8614
  • CoolxDad โ€“ coolxdad.com, info@coolxdad.com, (832) 882-1792
  • The Dad Gang (Houston Chapter) โ€“ thedadgang.com, info@thedadgang.com
  • African American Male Wellness Agency (Houston) โ€“ aawellness.org, contact@aawellness.org, (281) 657-6003
  • Avengers Youth Mentoring Organization โ€“ avengersteam.org, edwarddean@avengersteam.org, (313) 656-7214

I'm originally from Cincinnati. I'm a husband and father to six children. I'm an associate pastor for the Shrine of Black Madonna (Houston). I am a lecturer (adjunct professor) in the University of Houston...