Nicki Minaj has been through a lot. There are some things she’s shared and those she hasn’t—and probably won’t ever speak about. But in a new, upcoming documentary, entitled Queen, after her latest effort, Minaj opens up and speaks about her upbringing, watching an abusive father.

These are things she’s mentioned before. I always recall the story of her father trying to burn their house down, when he believed their mother was inside.

But what is new is Nicki sharing how she found herself in a similar, violent situation in her own life, years later.

Check out the clip from the documentary below.

“I remember when my mother would let my father be violent with her. And she always brings up this story, as a little girl, I would stand in front of my mother and go like this. *Spreads arms wide.* And I vowed—like, that’s why—maybe some people would describe me as abrasive or bitchy or whatever because, I vowed from that age, no man would ever abuse me, call me out my name, treat me like that.

And then all of a sudden, that was my life. Everything that I said I would never…

Who was I going to inspire when I had nothing in me to give? Like, I let one human being make me so low that I didn’t even remember who I was. I was scared to get in the studio. I didn’t believe in myself.

All of a sudden, in Miami—I started catching a vibe as soon as I went to Miami. As soon as I changed locations, I started catching a vibe. And then one day, I got the vibe, it’s time to go to New York.

And you were there, “Coco Chanel,” “Miami,” “Good Form” all of those things just started as mumbles in the studio in New York.”